He said, ”I know, but when you are telling a story, and you say a small dog was following you, and you
were not afraid – that does not fit. A lion is needed. And as far as exaggeration is concerned, you
are telling me that you have told me one thousand times not to exaggerate. You are exaggerating
yourself.”
Everybody is making himself look, in every possible way, like somebody special.
You are talking about your suffering and somebody says, ”It is nothing.” You will be hurt, you will not
like this response. You were telling such a great story; you were opening your wounds and that man
said, ”This is nothing. You should know my suffering.”
Suffering also becomes a support to your ego. A man without suffering, without pain, without any
misery – how can he manage his ego? He won’t have any props for the ego.
I used to stay with one of the presidents of the Indian National Congress – which has been the ruling
party since independence. His name was Uchchhangrai Dhebar, and he loved me very much. He
was the only politician of that status who used to come to the camps to meditate, to participate. He
was really a nice person. It is very difficult to find in politicians that quality of niceness.
He was talking about the great problems that he was facing. I listened, and I told him, ”You can
talk about these things to other people – don’t waste my time. If you can do something about those
things then do it; otherwise what is the point of unnecessarily talking? I am not the person interested
in that kind of thing.”
Just then the phone rang and he took it. The prime minister was calling, and Uchchhangrai Dhebar
said, ”I am very much engaged right now.” And he was not engaged at all – we were just gossiping!
He said, ”I am very much engaged right now; today it is not possible for me to meet you. Perhaps
tomorrow I can manage. I will have to enquire from my secretary.”
As their conversation was finished I said, ”I don’t see that you are engaged.”
He said, ”That is not the point. When a prime minister phones – and I am the president of the party
as far as organization is concerned, he is just a member of the organization .... He may be the
prime minister, but when a prime minister calls me, I am always engaged. When the president of
the country calls me, I am always engaged. These people understand only that language.
”If I just go and run to his house and say, ‘Yes, sir, I am here, what do you want?’ then what is
the point of being the president of the party? So much struggle, so much trouble, so much conflict,
quarreling, and then in the end I have been able to become the president. And you want me to say
to the prime minister that I am gossiping, I am free, I have nothing to do? Now I am engaged in
great problems.”
I said, ”Perhaps the same is true when you are talking about your great problems to me. At least
with me be sincere. I am not the prime minister or the president.”
He looked into my eyes for a moment and he said, ”You are right. I was just bragging about how
much puzzled I am, how much trouble my life is. To be the president of the ruling party of such a
vast country is to be lying on a bed of thorns.”
He was sleeping on a Dunlop mattress. I said, ”What are you talking about? I see you sleep on a
Dunlop mattress!”
I cannot sleep on one of those because it is so soft that the moment you move, it moves with you. It
keeps me awake; I am waking continuously the whole night.
Once Teertha brought for me a water bed. That night I will never forget. That water bed must be
supplied in hell, because you turn and the whole water inside moves just underneath you. That
much water movement – how can you sleep? I can sleep on a hard floor; it may hurt a little bit, but
sooner or later you will fall asleep. But on a water bed ... and that was the latest ”in thing” so Teertha
brought it for me. I had to suffer many latest in things.
You cannot get rid of your miseries for the simple reason that you don’t have anything else to cling
to. You will be empty – and nobody wants to be empty. People befool themselves in every possible
way.
I have visited areas where people were so hungry – starving; they had no food. I enquired, ”You
don’t have any food, how do you manage to sleep?” – because without food you cannot sleep. In
fact sleep is needed for one of the most basic reasons: to digest food. So all other activity is dropped
and your whole energy goes into digestion. But when you don’t have any food in the stomach, sleep
becomes difficult.
I have been fasting, so I know. Before the fasting day, the whole night you go on tossing and turning,
thinking of the next day and the delicious foods. And when you are hungry anything looks delicious.
But you cannot sleep. I asked, ”How do you manage to sleep?”
They said, ”We drink a lot of water to fill the belly, to deceive the body, and then sleep comes.” They
know perfectly well they are deceiving; water is not nourishment. The body is asking for food, and
they are giving water because only water is available. But at least something is in the stomach, it is
not empty.
This is the situation as far as your psychological emptiness is concerned: anything will do. Nothing
is not acceptable to you. And unless nothing is acceptable to you, you are not ready to get rid of
your pain, misery, and suffering.
You say, ”Knowing perfectly well ....” You don’t know at all, and you are saying, ”Knowing perfectly
well.” You know nothing. ”Knowing perfectly well” means that if you understand, all these sufferings
and miseries will drop of their own accord.
Knowing perfectly well and still continuing to suffer, to be miserable – no, it is not possible. Either
you don’t know or you cannot suffer. You cannot be allowed both together: knowing perfectly well
and still suffering. And your last sentence makes it clear that that knowledge is not knowing. It may
be knowledge.
You say, ”Knowing perfectly well that one just has to understand and drop them.” It is a little delicate
affair – to understand and drop them ... as if after understanding you will have to drop them. That’s
not how it happens.
were not afraid – that does not fit. A lion is needed. And as far as exaggeration is concerned, you
are telling me that you have told me one thousand times not to exaggerate. You are exaggerating
yourself.”
Everybody is making himself look, in every possible way, like somebody special.
You are talking about your suffering and somebody says, ”It is nothing.” You will be hurt, you will not
like this response. You were telling such a great story; you were opening your wounds and that man
said, ”This is nothing. You should know my suffering.”
Suffering also becomes a support to your ego. A man without suffering, without pain, without any
misery – how can he manage his ego? He won’t have any props for the ego.
I used to stay with one of the presidents of the Indian National Congress – which has been the ruling
party since independence. His name was Uchchhangrai Dhebar, and he loved me very much. He
was the only politician of that status who used to come to the camps to meditate, to participate. He
was really a nice person. It is very difficult to find in politicians that quality of niceness.
He was talking about the great problems that he was facing. I listened, and I told him, ”You can
talk about these things to other people – don’t waste my time. If you can do something about those
things then do it; otherwise what is the point of unnecessarily talking? I am not the person interested
in that kind of thing.”
Just then the phone rang and he took it. The prime minister was calling, and Uchchhangrai Dhebar
said, ”I am very much engaged right now.” And he was not engaged at all – we were just gossiping!
He said, ”I am very much engaged right now; today it is not possible for me to meet you. Perhaps
tomorrow I can manage. I will have to enquire from my secretary.”
As their conversation was finished I said, ”I don’t see that you are engaged.”
He said, ”That is not the point. When a prime minister phones – and I am the president of the party
as far as organization is concerned, he is just a member of the organization .... He may be the
prime minister, but when a prime minister calls me, I am always engaged. When the president of
the country calls me, I am always engaged. These people understand only that language.
”If I just go and run to his house and say, ‘Yes, sir, I am here, what do you want?’ then what is
the point of being the president of the party? So much struggle, so much trouble, so much conflict,
quarreling, and then in the end I have been able to become the president. And you want me to say
to the prime minister that I am gossiping, I am free, I have nothing to do? Now I am engaged in
great problems.”
I said, ”Perhaps the same is true when you are talking about your great problems to me. At least
with me be sincere. I am not the prime minister or the president.”
He looked into my eyes for a moment and he said, ”You are right. I was just bragging about how
much puzzled I am, how much trouble my life is. To be the president of the ruling party of such a
vast country is to be lying on a bed of thorns.”
He was sleeping on a Dunlop mattress. I said, ”What are you talking about? I see you sleep on a
Dunlop mattress!”
I cannot sleep on one of those because it is so soft that the moment you move, it moves with you. It
keeps me awake; I am waking continuously the whole night.
Once Teertha brought for me a water bed. That night I will never forget. That water bed must be
supplied in hell, because you turn and the whole water inside moves just underneath you. That
much water movement – how can you sleep? I can sleep on a hard floor; it may hurt a little bit, but
sooner or later you will fall asleep. But on a water bed ... and that was the latest ”in thing” so Teertha
brought it for me. I had to suffer many latest in things.
You cannot get rid of your miseries for the simple reason that you don’t have anything else to cling
to. You will be empty – and nobody wants to be empty. People befool themselves in every possible
way.
I have visited areas where people were so hungry – starving; they had no food. I enquired, ”You
don’t have any food, how do you manage to sleep?” – because without food you cannot sleep. In
fact sleep is needed for one of the most basic reasons: to digest food. So all other activity is dropped
and your whole energy goes into digestion. But when you don’t have any food in the stomach, sleep
becomes difficult.
I have been fasting, so I know. Before the fasting day, the whole night you go on tossing and turning,
thinking of the next day and the delicious foods. And when you are hungry anything looks delicious.
But you cannot sleep. I asked, ”How do you manage to sleep?”
They said, ”We drink a lot of water to fill the belly, to deceive the body, and then sleep comes.” They
know perfectly well they are deceiving; water is not nourishment. The body is asking for food, and
they are giving water because only water is available. But at least something is in the stomach, it is
not empty.
This is the situation as far as your psychological emptiness is concerned: anything will do. Nothing
is not acceptable to you. And unless nothing is acceptable to you, you are not ready to get rid of
your pain, misery, and suffering.
You say, ”Knowing perfectly well ....” You don’t know at all, and you are saying, ”Knowing perfectly
well.” You know nothing. ”Knowing perfectly well” means that if you understand, all these sufferings
and miseries will drop of their own accord.
Knowing perfectly well and still continuing to suffer, to be miserable – no, it is not possible. Either
you don’t know or you cannot suffer. You cannot be allowed both together: knowing perfectly well
and still suffering. And your last sentence makes it clear that that knowledge is not knowing. It may
be knowledge.
You say, ”Knowing perfectly well that one just has to understand and drop them.” It is a little delicate
affair – to understand and drop them ... as if after understanding you will have to drop them. That’s
not how it happens.
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